


Christmassy Drabble Tree

by Janamelie, LordValeryMimes, notalwaysweak, RoseCathy



Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: Christmas, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-09 02:11:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8871619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janamelie/pseuds/Janamelie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordValeryMimes/pseuds/LordValeryMimes, https://archiveofourown.org/users/notalwaysweak/pseuds/notalwaysweak, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseCathy/pseuds/RoseCathy
Summary: This is a collection of Christmas themed mini-fics which were originally posted as a drabble tree to LJ in 2014.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The way this works is that one person posts a drabble (about 100 words; it doesn't have to be exact) and the next person takes a line from that and uses it in their own drabble.
> 
> So this isn't one story but several.

_"It's ruined!_ **Ruined**!"  Rimmer pointed a long, dramatic finger at the rainbow hued chart, which was divided neatly into squares adorned with painstaking copperplate handwriting.

Lister raised an eyebrow as he wafted the stench of charred pudding away from his nose.  "Yeah, man.  The fact that I messed up your fancy table is really the important thing here."

"The pudding was supposed to be eaten by 3pm so we could spend the next hour relaxing, followed by "It's A Wonderful Life" in the cinema at four, then dinner at seven thirty..."

His despairing tirade was cut short as a pair of whisky-moistened lips landed on his own.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by RoseCathy. (Not myself, sorry.)

"I don't see why not," Lister drawled, leaning even more heavily on the back of the chair.

"It's meant to hold one person. One. It says so on the label! Besides, even if it could take both our weights, the hydraulics simply weren't designed for rapid up-and-down movement at the rate of - "

His despairing tirade was cut short as a pair of whisky-moistened lips landed on his own. 

"Rapid, eh?" Rimmer kept his eyes closed after they'd parted; his cheeks were on fire. "Why don't you settle down here - " — firm hands steered him into the chair — "and tell me exactly how rapid?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by LordValeryMimes.

Rimmer kept his eyes closed after they'd parted; his cheeks were on fire. His self-inflicted blindness left him ill-prepared as Lister dove in for a second even more enthusiastic kiss. He stumbled and fell heavily against the wall of the galley, the press of Lister against him doing little to halt the flash of heat that was steadily creeping across every inch of his skin.

"Lister," he mumbled around the onslaught of his bunkmate's warm lips and tongue. With his eyelids determinedly closed, the hologram made a half-hearted attempt to hold his eager lover at bay. "Is... this... really... necessary..." he managed to blurt out in an awkward staccato while Lister continued to shower him with kisses.

"Just a few more," Lister murmured into Rimmer's ear before pulling the hologram to him. Rimmer, resigned to his fate, sighed deeply into Lister's mouth as he returned the kiss. Only when Lister finally pulled away, leaving him disheveled and painfully hard did Rimmer dare to open his eyes. Rimmer slid to the floor with a groan as he saw Cat, retching piteously in a corner, and Kryten, desperately trying to remove his eyeballs from their sockets with a soup spoon.

"Happy Christmas love," Lister cried out, spreading his hands wide. Rimmer gazed up at his bunkmate, for the first time able to fully appreciate the aesthetics of the mistletoe hat that Lister had concocted. Several sprigs of greenery hung from springy bits of wire that cascaded out from a Father Christmas hat. Perched on top of his bunkmate's happy, boyish face, the effect was somewhere between amusing and ridiculous. Rimmer found himself grinning in spite of himself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by NotAlwaysWeak.

‘The fact that I messed up your fancy table is really the important thing here.’

‘It is!’ Rimmer protests. ‘Apart from anything else, it took me three hours to persuade Kryten to let me use the good tablecloth.’ 

Said tablecloth is now rumpled and suspiciously stained. There are knives and forks on the floor, and the former centrepiece – rare holly and candles – is upside down in a bowl of trifle.

‘It’s your fault anyway,’ Lister says.

‘What?!’

‘When I suggested we have mid-Christmas dinner sex, I meant between courses, not on the table.’

Rimmer can’t really refute this sparkling-eyed observation.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by RoseCathy.

"What?!"

"Tomorrow is Christmas Eve," Lister repeated patiently.

Rimmer pulled a timetable from under his mattress and shook it as though he could shift Time itself. "No, no, you've got it all wrong, as usual," he gabbled, keeping his back to Lister. "Christmas is next - good god!" 

Lister chuckled. "So you haven't bought my present then."

 _I have_ , Rimmer replied silently as Lister sauntered out the door. _That's not the problem_.

He retrieved the gloves from their hiding place. If he weren't _him_ , they wouldn't seem so out of place, but...they'd most likely give Lister the wrong (right) impression.


End file.
